Friday, March 31, 2006
drench me.
I'm gonna go to school, ask MrAlexChua and MrYazid for a break.
One week. I'm gonna skip all trainings.
I cant take this anymore.
I need to observe and not participate.
I need to get my momentum back.
I dont need rain.
I need a thunderstorm.
I need you God.
I need you to pour down your love.
One week. I'm gonna skip all trainings.
I cant take this anymore.
I need to observe and not participate.
I need to get my momentum back.
I dont need rain.
I need a thunderstorm.
I need you God.
I need you to pour down your love.
Thursday, March 30, 2006
cabbage me.
I'm...
Learning to listen.
Learning to trust.
Learning to tolerate.
Learning to give in.
Learning to forgive.
Learning to let go.
Learning to compromise.
Learning to believe.
Learning to love.
Learning to be yet another me.
Learning to listen.
Learning to trust.
Learning to tolerate.
Learning to give in.
Learning to forgive.
Learning to let go.
Learning to compromise.
Learning to believe.
Learning to love.
Learning to be yet another me.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
dancing in the moonlight
Title's a tad ironic seeing that it's really bright and sunny now at 11.30am.
You know i'm feeling high lately when i start blasting electronica in the room once more.
You know it'll be ironic if i cant find time for others now.
You know i'll be getting into one of my fits soon since i cant seem to get my life straighten out.
You know i'm asking for it when i chose to bombard myself with all those plans.
You know i miss you when i cant stop smiling when i finally see you.
coz everytime we touch
i get this feeling
i can feel the static
You know i'm feeling high lately when i start blasting electronica in the room once more.
You know it'll be ironic if i cant find time for others now.
You know i'll be getting into one of my fits soon since i cant seem to get my life straighten out.
You know i'm asking for it when i chose to bombard myself with all those plans.
You know i miss you when i cant stop smiling when i finally see you.
coz everytime we touch
i get this feeling
i can feel the static
heats results
12x100m
Clocked a timing of 03:40.66 to get overall top among the j1 girls - for the moment.
But if they're planning to get the 8 qualifying teams from both levels then we wont even qualify.
Fyi, the last qualifying team's time (if we're going to combine the timings from both levels) is 03:35.29. Lost by more than 5 whole seconds. Sigh sigh.
4x100m
Got first for the 2nd heat with a time of 01:07.06 but lost to cherie's cg whom clocked 1:05.36. Knew we were running against the slower teams. Dammit.
If no one else beats our time, we would be able to scrape into the finals with the 7th placing. Sigh sigh. The last qualifying cg's timing is really close to us too - 1:07.09.
Ps. Fastest cg for 4x100m is gene's cg with 1:02.93. As expected. =X
Clocked a timing of 03:40.66 to get overall top among the j1 girls - for the moment.
But if they're planning to get the 8 qualifying teams from both levels then we wont even qualify.
Fyi, the last qualifying team's time (if we're going to combine the timings from both levels) is 03:35.29. Lost by more than 5 whole seconds. Sigh sigh.
4x100m
Got first for the 2nd heat with a time of 01:07.06 but lost to cherie's cg whom clocked 1:05.36. Knew we were running against the slower teams. Dammit.
If no one else beats our time, we would be able to scrape into the finals with the 7th placing. Sigh sigh. The last qualifying cg's timing is really close to us too - 1:07.09.
Ps. Fastest cg for 4x100m is gene's cg with 1:02.93. As expected. =X
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
chase.
Evan didnt seem too pleased with my new schedule.
Especially since i was laughing over the fact that i capsized 4 times on the K-1 today and that on the 3rd time my shoulder and leg cramped up when i capsized.
Yea.. I was stretching in the water and all. Haha.
Oh well.
He thinks i'm trying too hard. Pushing too much.
I just dont want to think about it.
I seriously wonder: Why am i packing so much things into my life.
The crazy pace i'm going wears me off so fast.
Every night sleeping with a constant fear of not being able to catch up one day.
I miss Evan's nagging.
I wish we had some time to sit down and just listen to each other again.
Especially since i was laughing over the fact that i capsized 4 times on the K-1 today and that on the 3rd time my shoulder and leg cramped up when i capsized.
Yea.. I was stretching in the water and all. Haha.
Oh well.
He thinks i'm trying too hard. Pushing too much.
I just dont want to think about it.
I seriously wonder: Why am i packing so much things into my life.
The crazy pace i'm going wears me off so fast.
Every night sleeping with a constant fear of not being able to catch up one day.
I miss Evan's nagging.
I wish we had some time to sit down and just listen to each other again.
Monday, March 27, 2006
Candy me.
Your Candy Heart Says "Hug Me" |
 A total sweetheart, you always have a lot of love to give out. Your heart is open to where ever love takes you! Your ideal Valentine's Day date: a surprise romantic evening that you've planned out Your flirting style: lots of listening and talking What turns you off: fighting and conflict Why you're hot: you're fearless about falling in love |
Hahahahahahaa.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Saturday, March 25, 2006
track
14-09 A-Girls 800 Metres Final
1 Tay Sze Ling VJC 02:26.62
2 Sum Qing Faye CJC 02:26.69
3 Cassondra Tioh ACJC 02:28.43
4 Loh Yanni RJC 02:30.32
5 Choo Xi Ying Denise NJC 02:33.47
6 Loh Qing Ying CJC 02:34.06
7 Haryati Megumi ACJC 02:34.13
8 Audrey Quek ACJC 02:34.64
146 seconds. My timing on wednesday's 193. Qualifying time last year was 170 seconds.
Argh. I am so so screwed.
13-11 A-Girls 400 Metres Final
1 Teo Bao Ling Amanda CJC 00:59.41
2 Cassondra Tioh ACJC 01:01.39
3 Tay Sze Ling VJC 01:01.86
4 Yeo Hui En Sharon NJC 01:03.29
5 Christine Kwok ACJC 01:04.02
6 Wong Li Ting Gloria HCI 01:04.19
7 Lim Ming Yen Linette SAJC 01:05.13
8 Lim Rui Fang Jessica NJC 01:05.82
59 seconds. Fyi, yesterday they held time trials for 400m and cherie came in first with a timing of 76 seconds.
Last year's qualifying time for finals was 67 seconds. Sigh sigh sigh.
Crap la. Really need to take my timing.
In the meantime, i shall go work on my stupid hamstrings. I could only lift one bloody weight la. I am so so pathetic !! Argh.
Ps. Shuyun is a lil' emotionally disturbed at the moment due to the fact that in the end she never got to take her time for 400m and that she did really badly for the 800m.
On a side note, i realise that my long jump qualifies. Yayness.
1 Tay Sze Ling VJC 02:26.62
2 Sum Qing Faye CJC 02:26.69
3 Cassondra Tioh ACJC 02:28.43
4 Loh Yanni RJC 02:30.32
5 Choo Xi Ying Denise NJC 02:33.47
6 Loh Qing Ying CJC 02:34.06
7 Haryati Megumi ACJC 02:34.13
8 Audrey Quek ACJC 02:34.64
146 seconds. My timing on wednesday's 193. Qualifying time last year was 170 seconds.
Argh. I am so so screwed.
13-11 A-Girls 400 Metres Final
1 Teo Bao Ling Amanda CJC 00:59.41
2 Cassondra Tioh ACJC 01:01.39
3 Tay Sze Ling VJC 01:01.86
4 Yeo Hui En Sharon NJC 01:03.29
5 Christine Kwok ACJC 01:04.02
6 Wong Li Ting Gloria HCI 01:04.19
7 Lim Ming Yen Linette SAJC 01:05.13
8 Lim Rui Fang Jessica NJC 01:05.82
59 seconds. Fyi, yesterday they held time trials for 400m and cherie came in first with a timing of 76 seconds.
Last year's qualifying time for finals was 67 seconds. Sigh sigh sigh.
Crap la. Really need to take my timing.
In the meantime, i shall go work on my stupid hamstrings. I could only lift one bloody weight la. I am so so pathetic !! Argh.
Ps. Shuyun is a lil' emotionally disturbed at the moment due to the fact that in the end she never got to take her time for 400m and that she did really badly for the 800m.
On a side note, i realise that my long jump qualifies. Yayness.
Friday, March 24, 2006
Gifford mentioned that i'm different. How i dont force it on just 'cause i believe.
Who i was shaped who i am.
To the one person whom taught me a ton, Daniel. Thank you so so much.
Evan, for standing by me all this time. For being by me during my worst hour.
God, for all that you've done.
For holding me up all this time.
For showing me hope when there seemed to be none.
For giving me another chance.
Take my hand.
Who i was shaped who i am.
To the one person whom taught me a ton, Daniel. Thank you so so much.
Evan, for standing by me all this time. For being by me during my worst hour.
God, for all that you've done.
For holding me up all this time.
For showing me hope when there seemed to be none.
For giving me another chance.
Take my hand.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
rise up.
And now I'm sunny with a High of 75
Since You took my heavy heart
And made it light
- High of 75 by Relient K
I'm reminded of this song by pn. =)
Anyway, i forgot to mention this just now. But tonight's a strange night.
This weird state of ambivalence.
Life's still a tad messed up. Okay. Maybe more than a tad.
Nevertheless, i'm feeling really carefree tonight. Very. So much that i want it to rain and to go out and shout it out of the system.
'cause you were there.
Thank you Daddy. Thank you so so much. =)
Since You took my heavy heart
And made it light
- High of 75 by Relient K
I'm reminded of this song by pn. =)
Anyway, i forgot to mention this just now. But tonight's a strange night.
This weird state of ambivalence.
Life's still a tad messed up. Okay. Maybe more than a tad.
Nevertheless, i'm feeling really carefree tonight. Very. So much that i want it to rain and to go out and shout it out of the system.
'cause you were there.
Thank you Daddy. Thank you so so much. =)
Hail S08 !
I'm bored. So i just be random. As usual.
Firstly, i pulled my calf muscle on my way home. Dont ask. No idea who it could've happened.
Secondly, my shoulder acted up - again. Before i even started canoeing. It didnt help that my bag was freaking heavy today. And i didnt bring my deep heat spray. This is so not helping it.
Nevertheless, hail S08 !
Especially since i'm finally sticking with my combi's people more now. And yes, shuyun the one with the goldfish memory remembers all their names too ! Yayness.
Suhaidah rocks la. Bitching about so many stuff with me. Not to mention the whole pw 'where's pak kiu ?' bit and the econs, 'Ivan's "praying" right now' bit. =)
Firstly, i pulled my calf muscle on my way home. Dont ask. No idea who it could've happened.
Secondly, my shoulder acted up - again. Before i even started canoeing. It didnt help that my bag was freaking heavy today. And i didnt bring my deep heat spray. This is so not helping it.
Nevertheless, hail S08 !
Especially since i'm finally sticking with my combi's people more now. And yes, shuyun the one with the goldfish memory remembers all their names too ! Yayness.
Suhaidah rocks la. Bitching about so many stuff with me. Not to mention the whole pw 'where's pak kiu ?' bit and the econs, 'Ivan's "praying" right now' bit. =)
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Lord, I need thee. =)
I need Thee every hour in joy or pain
Come quickly and abide or life is in vain
I need Thee, oh, I need Thee, every hour I need Thee
I need Thee, I need Thee, I need Thee every hour
- I Need Thee Every Hour by Jars of Clay
Live. Breathe. Speak. Do. Sing. Praise.
Turning back. I'm coming back to thee.
Come quickly and abide or life is in vain
I need Thee, oh, I need Thee, every hour I need Thee
I need Thee, I need Thee, I need Thee every hour
- I Need Thee Every Hour by Jars of Clay
Live. Breathe. Speak. Do. Sing. Praise.
Turning back. I'm coming back to thee.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
issues.
Woke up this morning feeling like crap.
Issues bugging me. Problems that i just cant seem to pinpoint.
I need my diary. Like really badly.
I need God. I've been drifting away lately.
Too preoccupied by life. Too packed.
I cant find time to sit and think.
Cant even find time to sit and cry.
I'm gonna take a break.
Sit and write that list that i said i would but still have not done.
Sit and read my resolution list and ask myself why i have been drifting back to doing all those things that i said i wont.
But i guess mainly, i need some time for God. Maybe that way my life wont seem so messed up.
Issues bugging me. Problems that i just cant seem to pinpoint.
I need my diary. Like really badly.
I need God. I've been drifting away lately.
Too preoccupied by life. Too packed.
I cant find time to sit and think.
Cant even find time to sit and cry.
I'm gonna take a break.
Sit and write that list that i said i would but still have not done.
Sit and read my resolution list and ask myself why i have been drifting back to doing all those things that i said i wont.
But i guess mainly, i need some time for God. Maybe that way my life wont seem so messed up.
mmhmm
Because i'm crapping so much with pn tonight, i decided to post up some parts of our conversation.
With regards to nigel and his hair which i am somewhat 'obsessed' over at the moment.
yun: and smitted by nigel. please. i just ate my dinner.
yun: i only like his hair la.
Enfresdezh: Y.O.U. L.I.K.E. H.I.S. H.A.I.R.
Enfresdezh: You like his hair.
yun: uh. yea ?
Enfresdezh: I'm dumbfounded.
yun: why ?
yun: very cute leh.
yun: i nv had any friend with that sort of hair la. furry furry one
yun: *poke*
yun: you fainted ?
Enfresdezh: i did
Enfresdezh: then nigel discovered my dp
Enfresdezh: and i woke up
yun: hhuuhh ?
yun: okay. i'm confused.
Enfresdezh:
Events
1. You like his hair.
2. You like his hair?!
3. *faints*
4. Ooo dp with pn in it
5. *wake up*
yun: anyway, what's with liking his hair ?
yun: *poke*
Enfresdezh: nearly fainted
Enfresdezh: but you poked
yun: what's wrong ? it's so so furry
Enfresdezh: you are crazy
yun: why ?
yun: elaborate.
Enfresdezh: I've never heard someone liking his hair.
yun: it's so so furry.
yun: like some pet
yun: aiyah. my mum deprive me of having a pet dog for some many years.
yun: maybe that's why i like his hair la.
Enfresdezh: Aww... do you wish you had Nigel instead? Can run with him... such a furry pet
yun: lol
yun: tell you something funny.
yun: i've a schoolmate that thought we were going out la.
yun: i was literally choking on my coke when she said that
Enfresdezh: it's not funny actually. haha.
Enfresdezh: it looks like the truth!
yun: pn. as cousins, although we might not be close, you should not question my taste.
yun: not till this extent.
Enfresdezh: that is reassuring!
Enfresdezh: you've just assured me of your sanity.
With regards to nigel and his hair which i am somewhat 'obsessed' over at the moment.
yun: and smitted by nigel. please. i just ate my dinner.
yun: i only like his hair la.
Enfresdezh: Y.O.U. L.I.K.E. H.I.S. H.A.I.R.
Enfresdezh: You like his hair.
yun: uh. yea ?
Enfresdezh: I'm dumbfounded.
yun: why ?
yun: very cute leh.
yun: i nv had any friend with that sort of hair la. furry furry one
yun: *poke*
yun: you fainted ?
Enfresdezh: i did
Enfresdezh: then nigel discovered my dp
Enfresdezh: and i woke up
yun: hhuuhh ?
yun: okay. i'm confused.
Enfresdezh:
Events
1. You like his hair.
2. You like his hair?!
3. *faints*
4. Ooo dp with pn in it
5. *wake up*
yun: anyway, what's with liking his hair ?
yun: *poke*
Enfresdezh: nearly fainted
Enfresdezh: but you poked
yun: what's wrong ? it's so so furry
Enfresdezh: you are crazy
yun: why ?
yun: elaborate.
Enfresdezh: I've never heard someone liking his hair.
yun: it's so so furry.
yun: like some pet
yun: aiyah. my mum deprive me of having a pet dog for some many years.
yun: maybe that's why i like his hair la.
Enfresdezh: Aww... do you wish you had Nigel instead? Can run with him... such a furry pet
yun: lol
yun: tell you something funny.
yun: i've a schoolmate that thought we were going out la.
yun: i was literally choking on my coke when she said that
Enfresdezh: it's not funny actually. haha.
Enfresdezh: it looks like the truth!
yun: pn. as cousins, although we might not be close, you should not question my taste.
yun: not till this extent.
Enfresdezh: that is reassuring!
Enfresdezh: you've just assured me of your sanity.
Reading my inbox makes me miss benji a whole lot.
Benji i miss our 'philo fits' ! >.<
Oh well.
Hmm. Pn and i decided to put up our photos as our dp to compare how different/similiar we look just now and from it we realised that pn and i should really go out for coffee one day.
Enfresdezh:
oops
Enfresdezh:
this is bad
Enfresdezh:
i couldn't recognise leh!
Enfresdezh:
1st glance: no shu yun
2nd glance: 1 guy 1 girl
3rd glance: she's not the guy, so she's... oh!
yun:
beep la
yun:
nvm. they say i look diff with my hair up
yun:
so wait ar..
yun:
see see
Enfresdezh:
EXTREMELY different
Enfresdezh:
hmm. i think i never see you much in person.
yun:
not my fault that YOU ALWAYS CHOOSE TO LOCK YOURSELF UP AT HOME
Enfresdezh:
haha that's true hor.
At this moment, he hints at his secret love for my ibook once again.
Enfresdezh:
unless i have an Apple __book... then i can lock myself in your house
On a sidenote, i watched v for vendetta again today. =)
Benji i miss our 'philo fits' ! >.<
Oh well.
Hmm. Pn and i decided to put up our photos as our dp to compare how different/similiar we look just now and from it we realised that pn and i should really go out for coffee one day.
Enfresdezh:
oops
Enfresdezh:
this is bad
Enfresdezh:
i couldn't recognise leh!
Enfresdezh:
1st glance: no shu yun
2nd glance: 1 guy 1 girl
3rd glance: she's not the guy, so she's... oh!
yun:
beep la
yun:
nvm. they say i look diff with my hair up
yun:
so wait ar..
yun:
see see
Enfresdezh:
EXTREMELY different
Enfresdezh:
hmm. i think i never see you much in person.
yun:
not my fault that YOU ALWAYS CHOOSE TO LOCK YOURSELF UP AT HOME
Enfresdezh:
haha that's true hor.
At this moment, he hints at his secret love for my ibook once again.
Enfresdezh:
unless i have an Apple __book... then i can lock myself in your house
On a sidenote, i watched v for vendetta again today. =)
Friday, March 17, 2006
pinklet.
I'm remembering/digging up quotes some close friends said to me after recalling that line jy gave on being in good hands.
And when I say you're in good hands, I dont mean TPJC by the way.
- JianYong
We may forget each other in 20-30 years from now. But we should never doubt the relationship with each other. I mean it when I say I will do all I can to be there for you. When you fall or cry; laugh or smile I will be there.
- Daniel
Who do you take me for ? I wont leave just 'cause you asked me to. Girl, we're friends, remember ?
- Kang Li
Ask not whether it'll be good enough but whether you've done enough.
- Andrew
Can you remember the first time we met ? 'Cause actually, i cant.
- Evan
Since God had put you to it, trust Him to bring you through it.
- Lyon
Well it was goodbye for then was it.
- Alexi
A gospel without repentance is not the gospel.
- Esther
What you receive will only be what you put in.
- Andrew
Haha. And benji's good night message.
G'night you little pinklet.
- Benjamin
And when I say you're in good hands, I dont mean TPJC by the way.
- JianYong
We may forget each other in 20-30 years from now. But we should never doubt the relationship with each other. I mean it when I say I will do all I can to be there for you. When you fall or cry; laugh or smile I will be there.
- Daniel
Who do you take me for ? I wont leave just 'cause you asked me to. Girl, we're friends, remember ?
- Kang Li
Ask not whether it'll be good enough but whether you've done enough.
- Andrew
Can you remember the first time we met ? 'Cause actually, i cant.
- Evan
Since God had put you to it, trust Him to bring you through it.
- Lyon
Well it was goodbye for then was it.
- Alexi
A gospel without repentance is not the gospel.
- Esther
What you receive will only be what you put in.
- Andrew
Haha. And benji's good night message.
G'night you little pinklet.
- Benjamin
Thursday, March 16, 2006
moo moo.
Moo moo.
As Nigel refers to it. One half of the present we gave dessie for his birthday.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
hush.
Vexed.
There's just so much emotions bundled up.
Wish it'll rain.
trust me when i say i'll be here for you.
-evan
There's just so much emotions bundled up.
Wish it'll rain.
trust me when i say i'll be here for you.
-evan
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
ouch.
Knee's acting up again.
So's the shoulder.
Ouch.
Never mind that. The shoulder's just slightly though. Lucky.
I cant afford a week's rest. Not yet.
Cg bbq is tomorrow ! Yayness. I shall hit the gym at amantha's place.
Pray the shoulder does not act up.
So's the shoulder.
Ouch.
Never mind that. The shoulder's just slightly though. Lucky.
I cant afford a week's rest. Not yet.
Cg bbq is tomorrow ! Yayness. I shall hit the gym at amantha's place.
Pray the shoulder does not act up.
showers.
Let your love
rain down on me.
I'm feeling really blissful tonight for some strange reason i still cant fathom.
Oh well.
Skipping math tomorrow. Will attempt to sleep in. =]
Love you.
rain down on me.
I'm feeling really blissful tonight for some strange reason i still cant fathom.
Oh well.
Skipping math tomorrow. Will attempt to sleep in. =]
Love you.
Monday, March 13, 2006
ampathy. if only.
Happy birthday desmond. =)
Too bad the rest of the cg couldnt go. Was your fault anyway.
That aside, i ran into keroy and (kok) yongquan at tampines mall today. =)
Seeing yongquan reminded me of the seemingly 101 people i'm so so worried about now.
I hate the empathetic me. Wondering how he's faring, concerned about how she's coping.
Everytime i think of them or run into them i just feel like giving myself a kick for not checking up on them lately.
If only everyone had time for everyone.
Andrew !! We were supposed to lunch since the beginning of last september !! Like when are we EVER going out ??!!
Oh well. That was random anyway. Bah.
Too bad the rest of the cg couldnt go. Was your fault anyway.
That aside, i ran into keroy and (kok) yongquan at tampines mall today. =)
Seeing yongquan reminded me of the seemingly 101 people i'm so so worried about now.
I hate the empathetic me. Wondering how he's faring, concerned about how she's coping.
Everytime i think of them or run into them i just feel like giving myself a kick for not checking up on them lately.
If only everyone had time for everyone.
Andrew !! We were supposed to lunch since the beginning of last september !! Like when are we EVER going out ??!!
Oh well. That was random anyway. Bah.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
canoeing.
My head seems to be spinning. Argh.
Totally forgot that Dr. Tan not opened on wednesdays afternoons. Argh. Went down. Sigh.
Cca orientation today, helped saba who was in canoeing to get people to sign up. Not too bad. Got like 10 sign-ups. Haha.
Mmm.. As i was doing so, i asked his guy from SA to sign up and well, after he signed up, while he tried convincing his friends, his actions reminded me of Daniel. Then i noticed he wears braces. Glancing at the paper, i saw his name: Daniel Ma.
Wow. Well, i'm speechless.
Anyway, going down to see the doctor later. Hope i'll get to see Simin. Haha.
Ps. I didnt see andrew (yeo) at school today. I'm kinda worried.
Totally forgot that Dr. Tan not opened on wednesdays afternoons. Argh. Went down. Sigh.
Cca orientation today, helped saba who was in canoeing to get people to sign up. Not too bad. Got like 10 sign-ups. Haha.
Mmm.. As i was doing so, i asked his guy from SA to sign up and well, after he signed up, while he tried convincing his friends, his actions reminded me of Daniel. Then i noticed he wears braces. Glancing at the paper, i saw his name: Daniel Ma.
Wow. Well, i'm speechless.
Anyway, going down to see the doctor later. Hope i'll get to see Simin. Haha.
Ps. I didnt see andrew (yeo) at school today. I'm kinda worried.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
ki.
I think i've got the flu. Argh.
Really should sleep early tonight.
Argh. Why must WangKi come back tomorrow !!
You idiot la. I'm like sick la. Argghhh.
Kkkz. Better go sleep early tonight.
Need to wake early tomorrow and be enthu. Running off from my og too much that i think i only know like a quarter of them now la. Shuyun !! So unsocialable how to run for council ? Heehz.
Hmm.. Must take a nice shot of Ki before he leaves for gracious knows how long. Oh well. Will so totally miss you la. >.<
Really should sleep early tonight.
Argh. Why must WangKi come back tomorrow !!
You idiot la. I'm like sick la. Argghhh.
Kkkz. Better go sleep early tonight.
Need to wake early tomorrow and be enthu. Running off from my og too much that i think i only know like a quarter of them now la. Shuyun !! So unsocialable how to run for council ? Heehz.
Hmm.. Must take a nice shot of Ki before he leaves for gracious knows how long. Oh well. Will so totally miss you la. >.<
Monday, March 06, 2006
life.
One of the guys from 05s29 committed suicide.
No wonder andrew was so quiet when i spoke to him today. Giving only the weak smile.
Words cannot fathom how i feel for him.
How it strikes a chord within me.
How it simply reminds me of YeeChiat once again.
Wonder where would he be if he was still with us.
That crazy laughter. That stupid scene of him and Joshua just keep replaying and replaying in my mind.
The memory of death is haunting.
It's almost 3 years already.
I really wonder, how our lives would've been if not cause of what had happened.
God, is this part of what you want me to learn here ?
No wonder andrew was so quiet when i spoke to him today. Giving only the weak smile.
Words cannot fathom how i feel for him.
How it strikes a chord within me.
How it simply reminds me of YeeChiat once again.
Wonder where would he be if he was still with us.
That crazy laughter. That stupid scene of him and Joshua just keep replaying and replaying in my mind.
The memory of death is haunting.
It's almost 3 years already.
I really wonder, how our lives would've been if not cause of what had happened.
God, is this part of what you want me to learn here ?
O2
I'm still trying to look for my house over google earth. But today there's the really really large cloud blocking my view. Awwww.
Anyway, today was rather ookay..
Most notable moment would be when someone mentioned Oasis causing me and Saba to break into a couple of lines from Wonderwall.
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Iris then heard us and joined in. Starting from the top.
The tune just kept spinning in our heads that the three of us were like singing it for the next hour. Saba later commanded us to start singing but well, she was too late.
I'm gonna upload the song into my iPod and phone. Bringing it to school along with my mini speakers to blast it at saba. Hehehe.
I really love the S09 girls. We're always up to some moronic stuff. I'm so so tempted to keep my combi just so that we'll stay together. Arrhhh.
Oh oh. Giddy had a haircut ! He looks rather funny thou' he didnt really cut that much. Haha.
Ps. Some lame nass guy asked for Iris' number at the interchange ! Like what a loser la. Darling Iris for some reason even gave her real number today. But she didnt reply to his sms thou'. Hahaha.
Anyway, today was rather ookay..
Most notable moment would be when someone mentioned Oasis causing me and Saba to break into a couple of lines from Wonderwall.
You're gonna be the one that saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Iris then heard us and joined in. Starting from the top.
The tune just kept spinning in our heads that the three of us were like singing it for the next hour. Saba later commanded us to start singing but well, she was too late.
I'm gonna upload the song into my iPod and phone. Bringing it to school along with my mini speakers to blast it at saba. Hehehe.
I really love the S09 girls. We're always up to some moronic stuff. I'm so so tempted to keep my combi just so that we'll stay together. Arrhhh.
Oh oh. Giddy had a haircut ! He looks rather funny thou' he didnt really cut that much. Haha.
Ps. Some lame nass guy asked for Iris' number at the interchange ! Like what a loser la. Darling Iris for some reason even gave her real number today. But she didnt reply to his sms thou'. Hahaha.
hold up.
Okay. I couldnt sleep the whole night.
I admit i'm freaked can ?
Sigh.
This is the start of a new beginning.
I cant believe that less than a quarter of the year had passed and i already am having regrets.
So many things left undone.
I hate myself for being an escapist.
I admit i'm freaked can ?
Sigh.
This is the start of a new beginning.
I cant believe that less than a quarter of the year had passed and i already am having regrets.
So many things left undone.
I hate myself for being an escapist.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
Orientation.
You know, i'm feeling awfully excited about it.
I'm thinking of making a placard exclaiming:
HI ! I'M SHUYUN !
the pink bitchy cow who grazes at the chocolate patch on the other side
GO DONATE BLOOD !
DON'T JOIN TRACK !
VOTE ME FOR COUNCIL !
even though i'm not running. yet.
or something like that and hanging it on my bag or something.
I'll run about to GuoMing, Desmond, Snowman, Bertrum and all the ogs that my friends're leading and mingle.
I really think that Daddy has something big in store for me here.
I can just feel it. =)
I'm thinking of making a placard exclaiming:
the pink bitchy cow who grazes at the chocolate patch on the other side
GO DONATE BLOOD !
DON'T JOIN TRACK !
VOTE ME FOR COUNCIL !
even though i'm not running. yet.
or something like that and hanging it on my bag or something.
I'll run about to GuoMing, Desmond, Snowman, Bertrum and all the ogs that my friends're leading and mingle.
I really think that Daddy has something big in store for me here.
I can just feel it. =)
Friday, March 03, 2006
jae.
Surrendering to Your will.
I'm letting go.
This morning i woke up with a throbbing headache. So painful that i was crying in bed. I tried getting up but only to be forced down by the pulsating sensation. Fell asleep admiss it all.
Woke up at 7.58am, Jackson texted me, asking if i was in school. Told him i wasnt and asked if he was going later. He replied yes, after he checked. Rested in bed for a while more before his message came in saying he was posted to Nanyang Polytechnic and will be trying to appeal back to TPJC.
Went down to check, posted to Tampines Junior College (Science).
Saw Lewis online. Arranged to go with them to appeal.
Saw HuiQi and Esther online. Conference.
Joseph called. He started bitching about how he got posted to Mass Comm and passed the phone to Giddy for kicks. Crapped/Shrieked to him for about 20 minutes.
Looked at screen, Esther had typed out The Lord's Prayer to HuiQi for some reason i did not bother reading.
The line that just seems to stand out for some reason: His will be done.
Said my goodbyes and went offline. Started digging for relevant documents and surfing some school's websites.
Realised that i've misplaced my Results Slip. Well, either that or i threw it away (equal chances, really.)
What i gathered:
Report book
CCA cert
CIP cert
Prelim result slip
Testimonial
Form A
Bunch-of-stupid-NSW-certs
What i packed:
Report book
CCA cert
CIP cert
Prelim result slip
Testimonial
Form A
Present and card for Jackson
Notebook and 2 pens.
Bathed. Flagged a cab and met up with JinRong, Lewis and Jin's friend at MJC.
Got told that Form A was NOT accepted AFTER 3 hours in the school and that i'll need to make a trip down to buona vista to get a statement showing my results. Wilfred messaged. Asked to watch a movie. Shrieked at him about how his stupid school rejected me. Left mjc with Jin and Co for TPJC.
Arrived at TPJC. Saw S09 people at the foyer. Realised that OG groupings're out. Checked. OG 20. Not one person i know.
Desmond saw me. Ran up, asked if i was in the OG he was leading. Checked. Nope. Looked at OGL list. Saw bundles of familiar names. Saw OG 20's leader. Some total unknown female to both me and desmond.
Went to library to pass Jackson the gift. Saw Yazid on way up. He ignored me when i said hi. Too pissed i guess. Went off with Jin and Co. for lunch after handing over the stuff to Jackson.
Shared cab with Jin and Lewis home. Rested. Bathed again. Checked more stuff. Left home at 5 to go for track trials.
Flagged a cab again.
Uncle doesnt seem to know the directions. Called Aung. Pasir Ris Street 71. Uncle nods. QuanQi calls up to enquire about some stuff. Does not notice where Uncle is driving.
25 minutes later, Uncle mentions that no mjc here in street 11. Shrieks. 71. Not 11.
Arrives half an hour late. Trials seem to be over.
Called Aung. Sat and spoke to him. Bitched. Went home.
It was so surreal. On the train to bedok. I just had this voice at the back of my head whispering. Asking me to give up.
I debated with it for a while.
Maybe. Maybe it's just not meant to be. Twice. Twice.
Maybe. Maybe there's other plans for me here. At TPJC.
Maybe. Maybe i should just give up.
Strange as it seems, i felt like i'm standing at the edge of a cliff and still being made to walk on.
Even more surrealistically, this line popped into my head:
When God leads you to the edge of a cliff. Trust Him for either He'll catch you when you fall or He'll teach you how to fly.
I bit my tongue. Took a deep breath. Then told myself to let go.
Instead of blaming myself. I felt this gush of peace. I'm not saying to myself that, shuyun, you're letting yourself down; you're letting evan down; you're letting your parents down. Neither was i thinking of how bad the tutors are; how all my friends're leaving; how my og is filled with no one i know. I just felt calm.
I wont be appealing anymore.
He has plans. Be it whatever is in store for me.
I'm leaving myself in His hands.
I'm letting go.
This morning i woke up with a throbbing headache. So painful that i was crying in bed. I tried getting up but only to be forced down by the pulsating sensation. Fell asleep admiss it all.
Woke up at 7.58am, Jackson texted me, asking if i was in school. Told him i wasnt and asked if he was going later. He replied yes, after he checked. Rested in bed for a while more before his message came in saying he was posted to Nanyang Polytechnic and will be trying to appeal back to TPJC.
Went down to check, posted to Tampines Junior College (Science).
Saw Lewis online. Arranged to go with them to appeal.
Saw HuiQi and Esther online. Conference.
Joseph called. He started bitching about how he got posted to Mass Comm and passed the phone to Giddy for kicks. Crapped/Shrieked to him for about 20 minutes.
Looked at screen, Esther had typed out The Lord's Prayer to HuiQi for some reason i did not bother reading.
The line that just seems to stand out for some reason: His will be done.
Said my goodbyes and went offline. Started digging for relevant documents and surfing some school's websites.
Realised that i've misplaced my Results Slip. Well, either that or i threw it away (equal chances, really.)
What i gathered:
Report book
CCA cert
CIP cert
Prelim result slip
Testimonial
Form A
Bunch-of-stupid-NSW-certs
What i packed:
Report book
CCA cert
CIP cert
Prelim result slip
Testimonial
Form A
Present and card for Jackson
Notebook and 2 pens.
Bathed. Flagged a cab and met up with JinRong, Lewis and Jin's friend at MJC.
Got told that Form A was NOT accepted AFTER 3 hours in the school and that i'll need to make a trip down to buona vista to get a statement showing my results. Wilfred messaged. Asked to watch a movie. Shrieked at him about how his stupid school rejected me. Left mjc with Jin and Co for TPJC.
Arrived at TPJC. Saw S09 people at the foyer. Realised that OG groupings're out. Checked. OG 20. Not one person i know.
Desmond saw me. Ran up, asked if i was in the OG he was leading. Checked. Nope. Looked at OGL list. Saw bundles of familiar names. Saw OG 20's leader. Some total unknown female to both me and desmond.
Went to library to pass Jackson the gift. Saw Yazid on way up. He ignored me when i said hi. Too pissed i guess. Went off with Jin and Co. for lunch after handing over the stuff to Jackson.
Shared cab with Jin and Lewis home. Rested. Bathed again. Checked more stuff. Left home at 5 to go for track trials.
Flagged a cab again.
Uncle doesnt seem to know the directions. Called Aung. Pasir Ris Street 71. Uncle nods. QuanQi calls up to enquire about some stuff. Does not notice where Uncle is driving.
25 minutes later, Uncle mentions that no mjc here in street 11. Shrieks. 71. Not 11.
Arrives half an hour late. Trials seem to be over.
Called Aung. Sat and spoke to him. Bitched. Went home.
It was so surreal. On the train to bedok. I just had this voice at the back of my head whispering. Asking me to give up.
I debated with it for a while.
Maybe. Maybe it's just not meant to be. Twice. Twice.
Maybe. Maybe there's other plans for me here. At TPJC.
Maybe. Maybe i should just give up.
Strange as it seems, i felt like i'm standing at the edge of a cliff and still being made to walk on.
Even more surrealistically, this line popped into my head:
When God leads you to the edge of a cliff. Trust Him for either He'll catch you when you fall or He'll teach you how to fly.
I bit my tongue. Took a deep breath. Then told myself to let go.
Instead of blaming myself. I felt this gush of peace. I'm not saying to myself that, shuyun, you're letting yourself down; you're letting evan down; you're letting your parents down. Neither was i thinking of how bad the tutors are; how all my friends're leaving; how my og is filled with no one i know. I just felt calm.
I wont be appealing anymore.
He has plans. Be it whatever is in store for me.
I'm leaving myself in His hands.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
courage.
I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be okay
Together we can make it through another day
- Courage by Superchic[k]
Dont feel alright tonight. Refusing to left go.
I hate being dependent. I hate reliance.
'cause people disappoint you so often.
So often.
It just hurts.
So.
There's nothing much to say.
Really nothing.
Much to say.
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be okay
Together we can make it through another day
- Courage by Superchic[k]
Dont feel alright tonight. Refusing to left go.
I hate being dependent. I hate reliance.
'cause people disappoint you so often.
So often.
It just hurts.
So.
There's nothing much to say.
Really nothing.
Much to say.
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